Have you Been Reconciled?

Goodness - the Lord has, and is doing, a mighty work me, especially since my Mom was diagnosed with Stage IV Adenocarcinoma and given just 6-8 months to live.  That was on April 11, 2011 and 4 months later and it’s so amazing to see how God has worked. And…. I've had a front row seat to it all!! And it's been unreal. Remarkable, really.

I am finally allowing The Spirit to stir me up and I at last have the boldness and the tenacity to let my Jesus water spill over onto my family and friends. It's amazing what can happen when someone allows the Spirit to infiltrate their EVERYTHING!!! I'm a life that has been changed because of it.

 Here is a short devotional that I am hoping will make it into my book, when it’s finished. I pray that this will provide you with just a little encouragement and bless you and inspire you in all the right ways and places!!

The Process of Reconciliation

Reconciliation is a process that brings about peace or renewal in a relationship. I like things to be simple, so I came up with a list of what the process of reconciliation consists of:

1. A positive relationship exists

2. A negative or hurtful act is committed by one or both parties

3. One or both parties humble themselves to admit wrongdoing and asks for forgiveness

4. Forgiveness is willfully granted

5. Renewed or reconciled relationship exists

The Word of God gives us many examples of this process of reconciliation. One of my favorite parables follows this process from beginning to end.

If you will just take a look at Luke 15:11-32, you will find the story of the prodigal son. As you read through this passage you can see how it aligns perfectly with the process described above.

1. Luke 15:11, 12 – A father and son relationship exists.

2. Luke 15:13,14 – The son negatively impacts his father by taking his inheritance (a large portion of his father’s wealth/retirement) and wasting it on wild living

3. Luke 15:18, 19 – The son humbles himself and is going to request his father’s forgiveness and the opportunity to become one of his father’s hired servants

4. Luke 15:22 – The father willfully accepts and forgives his son and welcomes him back into the family.

5. Luke 15:24 – The Father and son have a renewed relationship.

This simple story gives us a great example of the process of reconciliation. It includes three aspects that are always involved with reconciliation: humbleness, love, and forgiveness. God desires to have a reconciled relationship with each one of us. In fact, the purpose of Jesus becoming a man and his death and resurrection was so that He could reconcile man’s relationship with God. This is the ultimate reconciliation:

1. God had an intimate relationship with man - Genesis 2:7-25

2. Sin entered the world through disobedience - Genesis 3:11-13, Romans 3:23

3. We must humbly confess our sin and ask for forgiveness – Psalms 51:1-2, Hosea 5:15

4. Jesus is willing to forgive the sins of all those who put their faith in Him – Isaiah 43:25

5. We then enter into a relationship with God which will last for eternity – John 10:27-29

God loves us so much that He put this beautiful process together so that we can have an intimate and fulfilling relationship with Him. He also desires for us to have fulfilling relationships with our family and friends. Jesus consistently preached that we are to forgive not only our friends, but our enemies (Matthew 18:21-22). I know that’s so hard to do at times.  But if God can forgive US, then who are we to think that we are above forgiving others? God has given us the process, but it’s up to us to put it in action!

Ask yourself these tough questions:

Who do I need to forgive today? How can I show them love?

Is there a relationship in my life that God is calling me to reconcile?

For the past 4 months I have spent part of each day with my Mom, and as we have talked about times past and various trials that either she went through or my Dad went through, there is one recurring theme…..forgiveness.  As my Mom has said, what good does it do anyone to be bitter towards someone else?  The person who has hurt or wronged us most likely has forgotten what they did.  Or if not, then they just don’t care.  We can experience the freedom and peace that brings a sweet calmness to our souls only when we mirror what Christ did on the cross and offer forgiveness, freely.

Lord, help me to follow Your example and to not merely PROFESS Christianity, but to POSSESS Your forgiving Spirit.  Remind me that I will never be able to forgive another MORE than what You have already forgiven me……I am nothing by a sinner, saved by grace…Your grace. Thank you sweet Jesus!

The Price is Right- Still Is

I have been burdened for my unsaved family members this week.  I guess as my Mom is getting closer to the end of her life here, I have been drawn to thinking about heaven more….and the path to heaven…which leads me to the only way to heaven….JESUS!!!

As I have been thinking about Jesus this week - who He was, who He still is, His character, His love, His teachings, His deity - I sense myself covering my eyes, shielding my heart, and forgetting what He actually did for me - and for each soul festering on this planet.

I love the easy:
I love to think about Him as Royal....at Christmas for instance. A little baby - born as King. (Luke 1 and 2, etc )

I love to think about Him as Defender ... rebuking the disciples trying to keep the children away - pulling the babes into his lap to bless them. (Mark 10:13-16)

I love to think about Him as Healer - traveling around touching the pain-stricken. Touching them. Does that strike you in your core? It should. His holy hands touched the defiled. The sore-covered. The bleeding..... The dead. We are wise to get the enormity of that. (Matthew 15:29-31, Mark 7:31-37, etc)

I love to think about Him as Deliverer - freeing people of demonic oppression - rebuking and casting out unclean spirits - thwarting their destruction of human hearts with just a word. (Mark 1:32-34, Luke 4:31-37, etc)

I love to think about Him as Teacher - sitting with the multitudes, having compassion on their souls, opening up their lives to the Divine. (Luke 8:4-15, etc)

I love to think about Him as Revealer - answering the door to anyone wholeheartedly knocking down doors to find Him. (Jeremiah 29:13, Luke 11:9)

But Jesus as Sacrifice? -  As tortured, stricken, beaten, crucified? I neglect it - out of ease and ignorance and haughtiness. All too often I look at the cross - I wear it around my neck and I point people to it and write about it....but I never stop to consider the reality of that tree - stained with innocent blood all for the cause of saving my soul. (John 18 and 19, etc)

 Jesus as Payment? As Stand-In? There's no words for that - and yet I still have very few thoughts towards it.

This may be why:
I fail to recognize the enormity and filthiness and number of my sin. I fail to recognize my absolute need for Him in this way. Sure - I can recognize Him as my King, my Protector, my Mender, my Reliever, my Instructor, my Affirmer - but oh, my Atonement? He is that, too. He is that, mostly.

His whole reason for moving among us? Me and you.

What's so incredible about this...audacious even....is that He knew it would be this way. (Isaiah 53) He knew that the one's He came to rescue would spit in His face. He knew that we would fail to grasp the gift He bestowed on us when He died in our place. He knew we would forget, refuse, and shun Him. And He did it anyway.

I've been praying a daring prayer- that He would show me my need for Him - particularly my need for One who is my Sacrifice and Savior. And that He would help me to always take a stand for Him, but to ALSO have the compassion for the lost that I don’t always show.  May it be so - for all of us....that we would get a glimpse of our own sins-pardoned. And that we would see Him, truly. And then that others, would see HIM in US! In our actions, not just our words.

Praying for all of my God-given friends.  I do love each of you!!

My Apology

I feel like a bad blogger.

As I'm going about each day - I think of a zillion topics for blog posts. But since I'm usually smack dab in the middle of either driving 80 miles to work, or 87 miles to my Mom’s after work, or actually working….- the neat little blog post ideas I come up with don't ever come to fruition.
I want so badly to be an inspirational blogger   who regularly writes and shares all the many ideas and happenings that God is allowing me to experience.  I believe that He gave me this desire to write for a reason.  And I also believe that He is allowing my life to have the path it is and has had for a reason.  That reason is to tell the Good News, share how awesome and mighty He is.  So I'm gonna commit to it. I am. Just as soon as I get more than 5 hours of sleep a night.  Spending time with my Mom in her final days just has priority now…but even in the midst of all that we are going through, I see God.  I feel God.  I truly do.  He is in the many kind gestures and acts of kindness that others are showing to us.  It has been so humbling to have so many people reaching out to us…..
So until I am able to be a more faithful blogger I'm gonna leave you with some wise words that have encouraged me over the last few weeks. Enjoy them. I'll be back here in the next few days to post again. Thanks for sticking with me :)"Sometimes we must stop praying for God's work and start doing His work."

"Complacency is a far more dangerous attitude than outrage." - Naomi Littlebear Morena"

"Blessed are those that give without remembering and take without forgetting." - Elizabeth Bibesco

"Hold yourself responsible for a higher standard than anyone expects of you. Never excuse yourself." - Henry Ward Beecher

I've Been Blind to My Blessings

My Mom is in her final days now and I find myself writing more and more trying to capture the moments and put them on paper.   If only I could!  I heard the most amazing speaker from a Focus on the Family broadcast, Kristin Anderson, who wrote “Finding Hope After My Darkest Day.”  All I can say is that the dam that has been holding back all the tears that I have tried to hide my walls of pretend strength came crashing down.

I just am so very thankful for my Mom and for all she did for me and instilled in me.  Most of all, for her Christ-like example that has permeated the core of my being.  I am trying to keep my focus these days on being thankful for what I have been given rather than what I am loosing…..

As I drove to work this morning ....listening to an extraordinary author speak about thankfulness - tears moved down my cheeks in a constant flow of emotion - each tear saying....
 "Lord, I'm so sorry for the ungratefulness I exude."

As she spoke - about death, about grace, about children, about love, about joy, about Jesus..... the overwhelming, yet gentle conviction I felt in my spirit was more than me, or the box of tissues on my car console, could handle. The conviction emptied me....and I emptied the tissue box.

The sorrow I felt for being so ungrateful in the midst of such blessings - made the tears pour forth... and pour forth....and pour forth.

I looked back at myself - my thoughts, my feelings...and my spirit crumbled to pieces. As I turned my attention to the past...to 5 years before...to 5 minutes before - I suddenly realized the ugly and immature web I wove of constant unsatisfaction and ungratefulness. A web, that only caught in it's trap more unsatisfaction and more ungratefulness.

And in that moment - an author much wiser than I - brought to my attention the affliction:

A blindness to blessings.

What's even more startling is that I created the blindness myself. The blessings have always been there. They weren't hidden or twisted or even small - they were in the light, obvious, and larger than life...... It was the sin-darkened, world-tented eyesight I had let myself develop - that tainted my seeing them. The blessings, that is. The bright and many blessings that littered my life.

What the author said of herself is also true of me...

"My default is always unsatisfaction. Always."

And it can't go on this way. My womb has been full too many times....my pantry too stocked.... my family too loving…my mind to educated....my marriage too committed....my bed too soft...my thirst too quenched....my soul too saved - to live wallowing in ungratefulness.

So now...as I wipe the tears and gather the pieces of myself  - I reach up to the One...the Grace-Giver, the Blessing Bringer, the Banisher of Blindness - to pour His grace forth on me. And the thought of His grace pouring forth....again, makes my tears pour forth. And I'm grateful.

The pouring out of me and the pouring in of Him...isn't that what we're after?

So He has me where He wants me. Not sitting at home in front of a computer- but broken in the palm of His hand. And as I lay in a convicted and tired heap in his touch - my eyes are opened. Not only to the dark realities of my ungrateful heart - but to the scars that lay there as well. For the palm that holds me - held the nails that save me. And the grace that drips from those wounds - heals the blindness in me...and the blessings begin to out-do the bitterness.

So as I charge into the everyday  - where life isn't a pretty poem and the Enemy crouches around corners - I realize my default can only be outdone by the out-pouring of Grace.

 And the web of darkness I once wove is torn because of Him. And it leaves me thankful, void of unsatisfaction ... full of Jesus.

You Can Choose Too

There is a song that has truly just captured my heart.  It's "I Refuse" by Josh Wilson.  He expresses so vividly in his song what should be on the minds of those who take the name of Christian.  Christian means to be Christ-like.  What better way to show the love of Christ to others than by reaching out and being the hands and feet of Christ.

I truly believe that when God allows someone with a need to cross my path, and then bring that person and that need back to my mind again and again, that He is speaking loud and clear to me.  "Show my love to them." Often, though, we sit b ack and wait for someone else to do what WE have been called to do.  I am guilty of that myself....but no more.

EVERYTHING I have belongs to the Lord,  NOT just 10%.  ALL OF IT.  I want God to fill my cup up with His blessings each and every day.  If I keep what He gives me today all to myself, then there will be no room in my life for the blessing of tomorrow. 

In the book of James in the new Testament, we are told, " To him who knows to do good, and does not do it, to him it is sin."  I don't know about you, but this girl battles with sin enough  each day without adding anything else to the fight. 

I want God's blessings.  Everyday.  I close with the lyrics Josh Wilson wrote.  Please take a moment and READ them.  What a powerful message. 

Wait?  Put off?  Walk away?  Wait for someone else?  I REFUSE!  how about you?

Sometimes I,
 I just wanna close my eyes
And act like everyone's alright
when I know they're not
.
This world needs God,
but it's easier to stand and watch
I could say a prayer and just move on
like nothin's wrong
But I refuse

Cause I don't wanna live like I don't care
I don't wanna say another empty prayer
Oh I refuse, to sit around and wait for someone else
To do what God has called me to do myself
Oh I could choose not to move
but I refuse.

I can hear the least of these
cryin' out so desperately
and I know we are the hands and feet of You oh God
So if You say move
it's time for me to follow through
and do what I was made to do
and show them who You are
Cause I don't wanna live like I don't care
I don't wanna say another empty prayer
Oh I refuse to sit around
and wait for someone else
to do what God has called me to do myself
Oh I could choose
not to move
but I refuse
to stand and whatch the weary and lost
cry out for help
I refuse
to turn my back
and try and act like all is well
I refuse
to stay and change
to wait another day
to die to myself
I refuse
to make one more excuse
cause I don't wanna live like I don't care
I don't wanna say another empty prayer
Oh I refuse
to sit around and wait for someone else
to do what God has called me to do myself
oh I could choose
not to move

A Blessing in Disguise

It wasn't a choice, I was forced. All stretched out and ready to run, I pushed the play button and nothing happened. After tirelessly trying to get the thing to work, I regretfully decided to run without it. As I started out, I missed my music. I have been jogging and working out with my tunes for over a decade now. I felt like I had lost my running buddy. Without my very loud motivation blasting in my ears, I could hear myself breathing. I could hear my shoes on the pavement.  .Those were not the only sounds I heard though.  What a surprise I was in for!!

As I ran along, I heard birds - tons of them. I heard the huge trees that line our driveway and the gravel path that connects our property to my father in laws  blowing in the wind. 
 I heard the hoofs of dear....5 of them...yes I said 5… I counted! (We have named the deer that live amidst the 32 acres we have the blessing of living on)... scurrying off through the gravel path and trees.  I heard friendly dog barks and neighbors saying hello. Usually, when I'm running and I encounter another person they just smile and wave - because they see I have headphones on. But this time, I was able to exchange a greeting. I heard kids playing; water running in a creek, and cars driving by. (It hadn't dawned on my music filled brain before that not being able to hear approaching vehicles is a safety no-no.) Wow. I had been missing out on a lot of nature's "noises".

But it doesn't stop there. My mind was clearer - more open - more receptive. Even....pure. My form was actually better because I wasn't stopping every 2 minutes to mess with my iPod. I traded the sounds of  pianos, guitars and drum solos for the rejuvenating song of the wild. I could pray and actually get a response. I could think about something other than lyrics. I felt refreshed, free. All while trotting down the road in my Nike's.

That reminds me....Several  months ago my computer died. It was long over due and I'm surprised it didn't happen before it did.  In between reading books, quilting, cleaning, and laundry - I frequented the computer chair. And since we live in the country, and choose not to get a daily newspaper and since  I don’t have friends that are close by,  the internet and Facebook  were my way to “connect” with everyone and catch up.  It's also where I found the good, the bad and the ugly in the news.  

 Until I got that black computer screen staring back at me,  that is. Oh yes, I was frustrated for a few days, but again, I was in for some good stuff. Literally, not having a computer at my fingertips all day long - changed my life. I spent more time reading, writing. I worked on Beth Moore Bible studies and I found that I prayed throughout the day, not just for a few minutes in the morning, or before my eyelids closed at night.  I mean I REALLY prayed. And I changed.  I’d like to think, for the better.

A blessing in disguise. Hmmm. There seems to be a theme here, doesn't there? Strip a girl of her music and her internet and you get a humbled lady more in tune to God than she ever thought possible. A lady that, even though she doubts and questions - can see the handy work of a Creator taking distractions away - and replacing them with none other than.....Himself! And I'll take Him over technology any day :)

To Be Content or Not

Love, consolation and peace bloom only in the garden of sweet contentment." - Martha Anderson

I love that quote. It gets me oh so centered and focused.

I'm not real great at being content. Actually, I'm  probably one of the world’s worst, always thinking that I need this or that to finally get my soul satisfied. But what I'm learning  is that contentment is more of a decision than anything else.

Paul, the writer of Philippians says.... “For I have learned in whatever state I am, to be content. I know what it is to be in need, and I know what it is to have plenty. I have learned the secret of being content in any and every situation, whether well fed or hungry, whether living in plenty or in want.” - Philippians 4:11-12

I JUST LOVE THAT!!!  Or, as Chonda would say, “ Isn’t that just precious!!!”

 Well, I have decided that I'm gonna pursue a Paul-like passion for contentment and for Jesus.  

1 Timothy 6:6 says, Yet true godliness and contentment is itself great wealth.

Godliness AND contentment. Now that is an unstoppable combination, isn't it? Know what else I'm learning? I'm realizing that I can't create either one of those things on my own - much less both of them. If I could - my ego would be as big as my hips!!!!  Nope. I need God…. His word….. and His people to encourage me on in this contentment quest. I can't do it alone.

" Women of adventure have conquered their fates and know how to live exciting and fulfilling lives right where they are (emphasis mine!). They have learned to reinvent themselves and find creative ways to enjoy the world and their place in it." - Barbara Jenkins

Did you get that?....the "RIGHT WHERE THEY ARE" part?  WOW!!!! That's good.  I mean that is REALLY GOOD!!! And the whole thing about "reinventing themselves".  It makes me wonder.... so what do YOU think those phrases mean..."right where you are" and "reinventing yourself"? Any thoughts? Please, share! (If anyone is reading this!).

Anyway, as I mentioned in my last post - I've been thinking about the upcoming year lately. The year is more than half gone already, and as I was looking back over my list of NEW YEARS RESOLUTIONS I saw that contentment is in the top 5.   Boy, have I almost blown it.  I know. It won't be easy. Contentment is a tough one. But oh, what a needed trait it is. Especially for me.  There are so many situations that God has placed in my life  in the past couple of months, that I really need to focus on being content.  Right where I am, with ALL that HE has given me.  I know that it’s so easy to think about what we don’t have, or can’t do, but as Christians we truly have it all.  We just don’t always realize it.